As a leader, I am constantly looking for wisdom to give me an edge. Through the years I have read books, listened to speakers, and attended conferences. In my search, I have found that nothing compares to the wisdom that is available in the book of Proverbs in the Bible.
This week, I would like to share with you 5 of my favorite life principles that are found in the “wisdom” book. Whether you are a God follower or not, I promise you these principles will help you become a better leader.
Principle #1 . . . Choose gentle over harsh.
A couple of days ago I witnessed a disagreement between two men. One of the guys, with a very confrontational tone, was challenging the competence of the other guy. The response of the one being challenged was amazing.
Without being defensive, the second guy simply stated the facts in a very humble way. He even showed remorse and accepted responsibility for his own actions. The result was incredible.
The first guy was caught off guard, and the response caused him to lower his own tone and to back off of his position a bit.
Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
When answering for his actions, the second guy chose to “go gentle.” His humility served him well and a potentially bad situation was totally diffused.
News flash . . . being harsh never achieves the desired result. Never.
A jerk is a jerk. He may be fooled into thinking he has power because of a position or title. But there is a big difference in being able to fire someone and being able to influence them.
Not only does harshness fail at the office it also fails at home. If you don’t believe me, just go ask your kids.
If you want to be a man or woman of influence, I suggest you “go gentle.”
That does not mean you have to lessen the standards. It just means you don’t have to be a jerk.
i2i,
Randy
Comments?
This reminds me of one of my pet peeves. That is, the misuse of the term “gentlemen”.
Too many men are far from gentle. We need to change that Bob!
Dale Carnagie agreed with the wisdom of Proverbs. In his book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Carnagie gives these 3 principles in dealing with others.
1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
I believe Carnagie would have loved your blog. I know I do.
thanks Ryan!
Professionally, there is nothing like timely honest factual feedback. It fosters respect. Personally, the same rules apply with a salting of love and consideration. Great lesson today.
thanks Mike!
Too many people associate holding someone accountable with being a jerk. This simply does not have to be!
“A jerk is a jerk.”
Thanks for the wisdom!
thanks Chris!
Randy, such truth you have shared. This very same principle and attitude is true for the education world as well. Gentle goes a long way whether with a child, an older student, or with peers!
Thank you for your thoughts. Kathy
So true Kathy!